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In a sea of faces//In a sea of doubt

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5/20/25 11:03 pm - friends only.

this journal is 98% friends only

comment here to be added.

(um, i add pretty much everyone :))

i've moved over to empiredownx 
add me there :)

5/18/08 02:40 pm


i had a whole entry written here but none of it had any point...i'm just sick of being a round peg in a square hole.

5/4/08 01:55 pm

In a sea of faces, in a sea of doubt
In this cruel place your voice above the maelstrom
In the wake of this ship of fools I'm falling further down
If you can see me, Marian, reach out and take me home

I hear you calling Marian
Across the water, across the wave
I hear you calling Marian
Can you hear me calling you to
Save me, save me, save me from the

Marian, there's a weight above me
And the pressure is all too strong
To breathe deep
Breathe long and hard
To take the water down and go to sleep
To sink still further
Beneath the fatal wave
Marian I think I'm drowning
This sea is killing me

I hear you calling Marian...

Was ich kann und was ich könnte
(What I can do and what I could do)
Weiss ich gar nicht mehr
(I just don't know anymore)
Gib mir wieder etwas schönes
(Give me something beautiful again)
Zieh mich aus dem Meer
(Drag me from the sea)
Ich höre dich rufen, Marian
(I hear you calling Marian)
Kannst du mich schreien hören
(Can you hear me screaming?)
Ich bin hier allein
(I am here alone)
Ich höre dich rufen, Marian
(I hear you calling Marian)
Ohne deine hilfe verliere ich mich in diesem Ort
(Without your help I am lost in this place)

3/8/08 04:32 pm

today is one of those days where i can't believe how self-centered i've become.
i need to reevaluate.


2/20/08 06:03 pm - do ya think i'm sexy

i do, Colin, i do.

i don't hate pride and prejudice anymore....thank you pbs.

2/2/08 02:34 pm

I think positivity is over-rated, but in the spirit of productivity, have a nice afternoon, chaps.

(those paintings are by Mala Iqbal, by the way.)

Also, I hope your health is good. Everybody has the flu these days--wash your hands kids!

1/5/08 07:13 pm - mmeemmee

ok i promise i will start my hw soon
but i feel like procrastinating right now
so let's do a fun meme i found

Step 1: Put your music player on shuffle.
Step 2: Post the first line/lyrics from the first 25 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing.
Step 3: Strike through the songs when someone guesses both artist and track correctly.
Step 4: Looking them up on Google or any other search engine is CHEATING!
Step 5: If you like the game, do it (if you do it just comment with your songs in this post)

1. At ten past nine, a feeling that's hard to define / I pass you by and wonder what you have to hide
2. The day you move I'm probably going to explode, it's true, I'm probably going to explo-o-o-o-ode Nobody Move, Nobody Get Hurt--We Are Scientists
3. I didn't hear what you were saying, I live on raw emotion baby / I answer questions never, maybe, and I'm not kind if you betray me Wake Up Call--Maroon 5
4. Yesterday I got so old I thought that I could die / Yesterday I got so old it made me want to cry In Between Days--The Cure
5. Oops, there goes my shirt, up over my head, oh my
Oops, Oh My--Ladytron (Tweet cover)
Floating the room/ Two by two/ From the womb/ To the holiday
7. Now I know that I can't make you stay, but where's your heart? but where's your heart? but where's your...
8. He left no time to regret, kept his dick wet, with his same old safe bet
9. You were working as a waitress in a cocktail bar when I met you Don't You Want Me--Human League
10. People will be people when they hear this sound that's been glowing in the dark at the edge of town
11. I think I'm drowning, asphyxiated, I wanna break the spell that you've created Time is Running Out--Muse
12. Saw you on the urchin side from under the boat / saw you making knots, saw you get the rope A Time to be So Small--Interpol
13. Let me out, let me out, I am suffocating I can't live without this all behind me
14. Two trailer park girls go round the outside, round the outside, round the outside Without Me--Eminem
15. She says it helps with the lights out / her rabid glow is like braille to the night Leif Erikson--Interpol
16. I was livin' in a devil town / Didn't know it was a devil town / Oh lord it really brings me down 'bout the devil town Devil Town--Bright Eyes (cover of Daniel Johnston)
17. A friend in need's a friend indeed / a friend with weed is better Pure Morning--Placebo
18. Every night my dream's the same / Same old city with a different name
19. All around me are familiar faces, worn out places, worn out faces Mad World--Tears for Fears
20. She's a special kind you know, the kind I'd like to see / hanging on a wall, watching me cross the streets
21. Blood red lips traced with a tongue they shine, cut through a crowded room / a look can say a lot sometimes so I take all my past attractions and project on you Written in Blood--She Wants Revenge
22. Thatthatthat that don't kill me / can only make me stronger Stronger--Kanye
23. I'm so tired of this, it brings me down / I'm nothing when you're not around
24. How do you preach the word if you don't know how to read? / Well they hold your soul once you sign the deed Jesus for the Jugular--The Veils
25. It took too long it took too long it took too long for you to call back, and normally I would just forget that, except for the fact it was my birthday, my stupid birthday :(
Potential Break Up Song--Aly & Aj

lol I don't think they will all get guessed
but oh well
okay! time to get to work and get some food and all of that nice stuff.
au revoir, mes amis.

11/3/07 12:36 am - c'est pathetique

oh well.
my favorite number!

survey/sevenCollapse )

10/24/07 03:07 pm - why do i smile at people who i'd much rather kick in the eye?

the smiths make me so happy. i know that sounds weird because their lyrics (go love morrissey) are so...depressive, but a lot of them are kindof funny too. i love "girlfriend in a coma". i was obsessed with that song last spring, i kept singing it to erin and she hated it. oh well. but the music itself is so happy-sounding to me. it just makes me think of sunshine and rainbows and warm memories of walking around to meet friends at the park or the store. maybe it's morrissey's voice, which sounds kindof dazed and dreamy but also extremely expressive and how it meshes with the songs, or the high pitch of the guitars, or the catchiness. who knowwwws.
haha. :)

but anyway. happy music. i'm trying to be positive lately.
we are talking about depression and suicide in my health class at the moment and it's weird because this stuff is all too familiar. it's sad how familiar, actually. it's sad that my friends and i are all so fucked up and so young!
i can't really feel angry about it right now though. it's peculiar. i'm hoping that having positive vibes will rub off on other people.

i was chosen at random to be in the fall fashion show this weekend, which the moms' club at school holds yearly. i hope the clothes they pick for me are cute. and i hope there are no stilettos! i can barely walk in those things, i'm afraid i'll either fall over or spend the entire time walking looking at my feet and therefore looking stupid. or my hair will look like crap like usual. or my posture will be bad. ewwww.

i love autumn so much, honestly. it's the last warmth of the year and i like to savor that...autumn has a mood of its own. i love noticing the nights getting longer and the layers getting thicker, and the leaves covering the sidewalk so that each step is like dancing on some subtly colored rainbow. i like all the high school events that happen in fall. i like just enjoying it all, really. i love nature. i probably say that a lot but honestly, i just love it. i feel so connected to it.

anyway. i sound like a big old hippie right now. i've got some homework to do, some plans to make, and hopefully i'll find something actually productive to do besides that. then there's school...omg no british literature classes for the next two days! yesss! i can't stand my teacher. i digress, i hope you're all doing reasonably well, even though i know some of you aren't :/
have a good evening :) much love to all of you.

10/2/07 09:20 pm - an assemblage of random thoughts/a question

a. Goat and horse eyes are the weirdest things in the world.
They look so incredibly creepy. Their pupils are shaped like horizontal rectangular bars, they aren't round like with most animals. I never knew that before my trip last July, when we randomly stopped at this petting zoo and we fed some goats up close and I saw their eyes and was truly mind-boggled. I just thought of it randomly. It's so bizarre, and I don't know why they astonish me so much, but they do.

b. Shittttt. Two tests tomorrow that I barely knew about. Yeaahhhh. Plus a French assignment I should have done days ago but didn't and now I've got to write the whole thing now. It's going to suck so badly. Same thing with my British literature homework. I'm awesome.

c. People keep borrowing my pencils and not giving them back and it hurts my feelings. :(

d. Poor Britney. But actually, not poor Britney. Or not. I don't know why I care so much about this broad. Her life is just so sad, I dunno, I want to like, get her to fly to some random place on the other side of the world and start a new life away from all the ridiculousness of California media. She should come to Detroit! Hahaha. Or no, Norway. Haha. Um, Iceland? She can be next door neighbors with Bjork. Yes.
Same with Pete Doherty! I don't even listen to the Libertines or Babyshambles but I'm like, in love with Pete. I want him to get better and drop the druggggs. I sound ridiculous but really I just spend too much time on ohnotheydidnt.

e. I have no idea whatsoever as to what to do for a Halloween costume this year. Any suggestions? I had a really awesome costume last year, so I don't want to do something generic and unexciting this year. I'm looking at Donnie Darko costumes (Frank the Bunny ftw!) but they are all like $300 so that's not really an option. What a mild dilemma.

f. Woohoo for having a free hour in school every morning now! Maybe Angie doesn't like it but I love having the time off, it makes things so much easier for me.
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