| Current mood: |  content |
| Current music: | the smiths (singles album) |
why do i smile at people who i'd much rather kick in the eye?
the smiths make me so happy. i know that sounds weird because their lyrics (go love morrissey) are so...depressive, but a lot of them are kindof funny too. i love "girlfriend in a coma". i was obsessed with that song last spring, i kept singing it to erin and she hated it. oh well. but the music itself is so happy-sounding to me. it just makes me think of sunshine and rainbows and warm memories of walking around to meet friends at the park or the store. maybe it's morrissey's voice, which sounds kindof dazed and dreamy but also extremely expressive and how it meshes with the songs, or the high pitch of the guitars, or the catchiness. who knowwwws.
haha. :)
but anyway. happy music. i'm trying to be positive lately.
we are talking about depression and suicide in my health class at the moment and it's weird because this stuff is all too familiar. it's sad how familiar, actually. it's sad that my friends and i are all so fucked up and so young!
i can't really feel angry about it right now though. it's peculiar. i'm hoping that having positive vibes will rub off on other people.
i was chosen at random to be in the fall fashion show this weekend, which the moms' club at school holds yearly. i hope the clothes they pick for me are cute. and i hope there are no stilettos! i can barely walk in those things, i'm afraid i'll either fall over or spend the entire time walking looking at my feet and therefore looking stupid. or my hair will look like crap like usual. or my posture will be bad. ewwww.
i love autumn so much, honestly. it's the last warmth of the year and i like to savor that...autumn has a mood of its own. i love noticing the nights getting longer and the layers getting thicker, and the leaves covering the sidewalk so that each step is like dancing on some subtly colored rainbow. i like all the high school events that happen in fall. i like just enjoying it all, really. i love nature. i probably say that a lot but honestly, i just love it. i feel so connected to it.
anyway. i sound like a big old hippie right now. i've got some homework to do, some plans to make, and hopefully i'll find something actually productive to do besides that. then there's school...omg no british literature classes for the next two days! yesss! i can't stand my teacher. i digress, i hope you're all doing reasonably well, even though i know some of you aren't :/
have a good evening :) much love to all of you.
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schizophrenique) wrote,
